I am writing today to discuss the universal conflict between Batman and Superman.
Now if you are unfamiliar with either of these heroes movies/ comics I suggest you move on to the next blog that features a housewife and a million pictures of her kids and 'food'.
Also I'm about to unleash a world of nerd on you, so be prepared.
The debate on the upcoming movie in which Batman and Superman are to fight has been vigorous and endless and unfortunately I have found the answer, which makes me want to cry.
Superman wins.
And I hate Superman.
I could go on for hours explaining all the ways that Batman is better than Superman, but then I would be here all night and it's already 2:30am.
What I will say is this;
Batman once took down the entire Justice League by accident.
Plus he's the universal symbol for justice and the spawn of Kick-Ass - the greatest modern comic of all time.
The Batman comics have an actual plot to them, whether the Superman ones are just like, "I'll push this, I'll float like a ballerina, I'll lift this heavy thing, I'll save this mother and her crying baby."
Blurgh.
Like why does every woman either have a crying baby or is a potential love interest?
C'mon DC, shape up.
And I'm sorry but what the fuck happened to Superman's undies?
I mean they were stupid, but they were the epiphany of Superman.
That's like taking away Thor's hammer, Spiderman's theme song, THE PENGUIN MAN'S BITE!
(Personally I've been scared to get too close to anyone's face in fear of them biting my nose off, but that's just me... And anyone who's seen the Batman movies)
But anyway... Batman rules and Superman sucks.
And so does Zack Snyder...
DAMN YOU ZACK SYDERRRrrrr! *slowly fades out as I run into the night streets to save a baby falling from a building*
Love to bits and back,
Everything and Anything.
P.S. Are they like, being oiled up and used as footballs or something? Like how the fuck do you accidentally drop your baby from the top of a building. Mother of the freaking year right here.
